Relief Society General Broadcast

I love the opportunity this time of year brings to listen to our prophets, seers, and revelators. This past weekend was the Relief Society Broadcast and I thought it was really good. As I was listening to it, I had a few things to ponder about my own life.

One of counselors in the RS Presidency talked about the "gaps" in life that we may face. One of her gaps was the gap of believing we are daughters of God and knowing we are daughters of God. As I was considering this gap I thought about if when faced with trials, do I question why it happens and whether God loves me. I thought about when I got sick in Mexico last month. Before we went Justin was really concerned about getting sick, especially me getting sick. I wasn't worried at all. I received a blessing and we prayed often before we left that we would be healthy. I had faith in those prayers and I didn't think there was any reason to worry.... then out of EVERYONE in the group, I get sick; the pregnant one. gets. sick. As I was laying in the hotel room unsure about what I had, feeling horrible and not being able to hold anything down (its a very scary feeling being sick in a foreign country, especially with the swine flu worry) I said to Justin, "Why did this happen to me? Why isn't God looking after me? I was sure I wouldn't get sick." He of course asked me if I truly believed God wasn't looking after me, and I said I was just sure I would be fine, and now I was sick.
After the whole thing was said and done and after all the blessings we received during that situation I of course knew God was still watching over me.
Blessing #1- Our translator, Simon. He stayed with us the whole time and helped us communicate with the hospital staff.
Blessing #2- The OB doctor we saw (because of a connection from Simon). He was amazing. He made a special trip to his office that day just to see me. He spent a lot of time getting to know me and the situation. He made sure everything was okay with the baby. He saw me again for a follow up appointment the next day. He knew what I could and couldn't have as a pregnant patient. And on top of all that, he called the whole thing a professional courtesy because we were there doing free eye exams for the Mexican people.
Blessing #3- Because the Dr didn't charge us a penny for all he did, the whole thing only cost us $100 dollars. I was in the hospital almost all day and didn't have a huge medical bill to worry about... what a blessing!
Blessing #4- We were somewhere where they had a good hospital with a good staff and good equipment
Blessing #5- The baby was perfectly fine!!
Blessing #6- The sickness I had wasn't too horrible... I think about all that I could have gotten being in a foreign country, and I'm grateful it wasn't anything worse.
OBVIOUSLY God loves me and was watching over me. Yes, I got sick, but it could have been 100 times worse. Just because God didn't answer my prayers exactly how I expected, he definitely answered them. What a comfort it is for me to KNOW I AM A DAUGHTER OF GOD.

As President Eyring was speaking I had another question come to my mind. He was talking about those early saints who came before us and the trials they faced. He said it seemed like God never led them around the storms, but rather led them face on into the storms, yet they still persevered with faith. They had one mission only and it was to establish the kingdom of God.
This is the question that came to my mind: What am I afraid of in sharing the gospel?? I am not even facing trials NEAR as comparable to what they went through, yet do I have that same desire? One of the greatest ways I can help establish the kingdom is to do missionary work... yet I seem to fail at sharing the message of the gospel. I'm in a mission field, yet I haven't once had a missionary moments since being in Memphis. In fact, I can maybe count two times where I have even had somewhat of a missionary experience at all in my life. What is stopping me? What do I fear? I don't know my neighbors and I don't make any opportunities to even get to know others who aren't members of the church.... I need to be a better missionary and learn from those amazing early saints.

It was a great broadcast and I can't wait for next weekend's General Conference.